So long, year of painful change and turmoil.

Yup, here we are again at the end of another tough year. But since it wasn’t as tough as 2008, making that list of things I did right is going to be a lot easier, right?

Of course. Because, as I wrote last year, it’s far too easy to look back and come up with everything you did wrong over the past twelve months–besides, where does that get you? Maudlin on NYE, and making a lot of ridiculous promises to not do this and absolutely do that to compensate for everything you messed up or didn’t do in the past.  Forget it.

I’d rather focus on the things I did right. That way I can start the new year feeling good about myself, and let any resolutions reinforce that forward motion. I’ve been doing this for years–about seventeen, come to think of it! I just wish I’d remember to make the list as I go through the months. But I never do, so memory must serve…

First and above all else, I hung in with my husband as he bounced from good to bad to worse and finally, to getting his life under real, permanent control thanks to a tiny little pill and a highly intuitive doctor. Thank you, and you’re welcome. (And a thank you to him for hanging in with me.)

I supported my daughter’s decision to leave school again while the others kept going. She’s waiting for them to catch up to her, credits-wise, and trying to figure out her life. I can’t really help, but I can get out of her way. Which I did. And that’s a good thing.

I nailed the structure and requisites for Ghostwriter Certification Training, and got eight people through the entire course while editing and tweaking the textbook’s contents. I think that counts as two good things. Maybe three. Whatever, I’ve helped change people’s lives for the better, and that counts for the list.

I helped a fellow writer figure out how to get her book into colleges. A BIG good thing.

I helped a wonderful new writer strengthen her novel and her skills. Yes, I know that’s my job, but she was a special case, and it took a degree of sacrifice to get  through the entire book. Both were definitely worth it. A good, good thing.

I accepted help. A lot of help. I even accepted the bizarre notion that I’m not Wonder Woman and can’t do it all myself. Very tough; very, very tough. But I did it. I even asked for it. I’m counting that as two, because the level of difficulty should affect the degree of goodness.

My list, my rules. Make your own list if you don’t like it.

What else? I gave away a lot of vital information to a lot of people. Not sold; gave away. The business people in my life don’t think that’s such a good thing, but I do. Oh, wait! I also charged for some advice! Asked upfront, “Will this would be Mastercard or Visa?” just like I’m suppose to do. So I’m counting that as two.

Yeah, I take it both ways.

What else, what else…? Ah ha! I started reading my “quirky/difficult” novel at my critique group. They’d asked me to bring something in, so I finally did. Most are sorry they asked, but a couple people are enjoying it. This book has been a touchstone in my life for a long time. No matter what else I write, my soul is wrapped up in HIRED BODIES. After two agents couldn’t sell it, I’d decided to put it in a drawer. Now that I’ve taken it back out, I find I still love it, and have even begun looking for another agent to try, try again. Absolutely, that’s a good thing.

Which leads to a bad thing linked to a good: I left my old agent and signed with a new one to sell SECRETS OF A GHOSTWRITER. Why was such a sad parting a good thing? I needed to infuse my author career with some energy. My old agent and I had gotten too complacent with each other. Another tough, painful step, but I did it. Doing tough stuff I’ve put off facing for years is absolutely a painfully good thing.

Where am I so far? Ten or thirteen, depending on how you count. My criteria; agree to thirteen.

Hmmm… anything else? Marilyn! I accepted Marilyn Jenett’s friendship and guidance into my life, which doesn’t sound like a good thing to have done, just a good thing to have happened. But since I am so resistant to close to new people, and since it took a conscious act, not to mention a leap of faith, I’m counting it as doing a good thing. No, make that a GREAT thing, because Marilyn has made a remarkable difference in my life, and I cannot recommend her FEEL FREE TO PROSPER  program enough. And no, I don’t get paid to say that. So that’s fourteen.

Oh, I bought Marilyn’s program for my sweet, wonderful, life-in-tandem sister -by-love. Definitely a good, good number fifteen.

I listened to my daughter’s ideas about how to commercialize SECRETS OF A  GHOSTWRITER. No, we haven’t made it happen yet, but the concept is wonderful and I listened instead of simply saying no. Absolutely, that was a good thing. Sixteen.

I reconnected with a friend without making undue demands on her. Another toughie. I’m counting it. Seventeen.

Finally, I made a major financial mistake this year. Major. Not bright. Easily avoided. Felt like an idiot for doing what I did. What a dumb thing to have done. But I’m going to flip it around, like a poorly constructed piece of writing, and see the good in it: I will never do anything like that ever again. I promise me. And if learning from an expensive lesson isn’t a good thing, I don’t know what is.

I think that’s it. Looking back, it’s been a remarkably healthy, growing year. I anticipate 2010 will be even more so, and I close the year with this blessing:

May you enjoy health, prosperity, rich friendships, and abundant good fortune through the coming year, and may you find yourself writing out a twenty item “Good Things I Did” list twelve months from today.

Happy New Year!